Are you looking for ways to encourage your husband when things are difficult?
Most marriages have periods of stress and tension. It is inevitable when you bring two flawed humans together and ask them to live together everyday while they work, clean, pay bills, raise children and navigate all the obstacles life brings. Stress is bound to happen. Encouragement can diffuse stress. When we sense someone is on our side, we become stronger and and the stress fades away. So, sweet sister, let’s talk about a shift of perspective that can help you to encourage your husband even in the hardest of times.
What can a faithful wife do to encourage her husband when things are stressful?
Psalm 13:5 points my heart in the right direction if I desire a home and heart that is full of peace and joy. I can always count on God’s Word to set my heart straight. (Click here to see the Bible I read each morning. )
Psalm 13:5 says – I will REJOICE because you have RESCUED ME!
- Rescue brings relief.
- Relief brings joy.
- Joy should bring us to an attitude of gratitude.
I don’t know about you but the Lord has been GRACIOUS to me again and again. His FAITHFUL hand is always willing to reach out a save me. Sometimes it’s the gentle whisper of His Spirit to my heart. And sometimes it’s His undeniable intervention in a big way. Big or small, His heart longs to keep me safe. Time and again He reaches down into my life and RESCUES me with his COMPASSION.
- My God is COMPASSIONATE! (Thank goodness!)
- And since He is COMPASSIONATE, I should be REJOICING! (His grace lightens my heart and sparks joy.)
- A heart that rejoices is free to offer COMPASSION and KINDNESS to others. (Shouldn’t we readily offer what God has so generously given to us?)
In light of God’s goodness, I should be offering compassion to those around me – not just friends and strangers but those who are closest. The ones who live in my home – my hubby and my kids – are in the most need of my compassion. I see them at their best and their worst. My husband needs my compassion. He needs to know that I am on his side – not just when he is at his best, but when he fails too.
If you feel stressed, try adding a healthy portion of compassion. (Remember, we are called by God to be a helpmate.)
- So when he is weak, I need to provide encouragement to strengthen him.
- When he is tense, I should be the one who offers a soothing word.
- When my husband is frustrated, I can offer kindness.
So often, I think I meet my husband’s stress with an equal amount of stress. But, if I’m coming from the concept of helping, my perspective changes. Suddenly, I am more concerned about making sure our relationship is right instead of making sure that I am right.
Let’s shift our focus – instead of focusing on his flaws, remember God’s faithfulness. And, let His faithfulness move you into action.
- When you see that your husband is having a moment of weakness, build him up with a word of encouragement. (Ephesians 4:29 “Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.”) Here’s an example – Hey babe, I love how hard you try even when things are really hard.
- When he is tense, offer comfort or humor (not sarcasm, humor!). Bring a favorite drink. Write a quick note. Lift a prayer so he can hear. (Proverbs 16:24 “Kind words are like honey – sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”)
- When my husband is frustrated (even with me), I can humble myself and respond with kindness. (Colossians 3:12 “Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.”) Try something like – That’s a tough one, but I know you’ll figure out the right thing to do. I’m praying for you. And, I love you.
As life keeps rolling, sometimes we forget the absolute grace the Lord has shown us. Psalm 13:5 reminds me to live and love with joy and compassion. My husband, above all, needs to feel the sweet gift of compassion. Compassion has the ability to peel away the stress and replace it with relief. Peaceful joy has the tendency to breathe life into weary hearts. You and I have been rescued SO THAT we can LIVE and LOVE with COMPASSION.
Let’s take our faith and wrap it into our wifehood.
How can you show your husband more compassion?